252 Comments

My word is: Focus

Because I am constantly and consistently allowing distractions to divert my attention to what matters most in my life.

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FOCUS has been resonating with me, Jonathan, and I also gave it a twist: FOLKUS: to notice the beauty, the Imago Dei, in people and call it out, even —especially—people I find difficult or disturbing. In fact, I dreamed about that last night. To paraphrase another writer: We have met the folk, and they are us.

But it’s a double meaning: pay attention; turn off the stove when taking the pot off the burner; stop/look/listen; be aware of chasing dopamine.

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I loved your twist! Focus to Folkus! Taking time to see the gifts of uniqueness in others. Thank you.

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Ohmygosh this is so beautiful. I may have found my second word for the year. Thank you, Michele! xo

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This was the first daily meditation of the year from Frederick Buechner. Deeply resonates, Michele!

Happy New Year, brother! And yes, that resonates deeply.

I DISCOVERED THAT IF you really keep your eye peeled to it and your ears open, if you really pay attention to it, even such a limited and limiting life as the one I was living on Rupert Mountain opened up onto extraordinary vistas. Taking your children to school and kissing your wife goodbye. Eating lunch with a friend. Trying to do a decent day's work. Hearing the rain patter against the window. There is no event so commonplace but that God is present within it, always hiddenly, always leaving you room to recognize him or not to recognize him, but all the more fascinatingly because of that, all the more compellingly and hauntingly. . . . If I were called upon to state in a few words the essence of everything I was trying to say both as a novelist and as a preacher, it would be something like this: Listen to your life. See it for the fathomless mystery that it is. In the boredom and pain of it no less than in the excitement and gladness: touch, taste, smell your way to the holy and hidden heart of it because in the last analysis all moments are key moments, and life itself is grace.

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INTUITION

I've learned that I can't trust my ambition for guidance. It's too hungry. Nor can I entirely trust my passion, because it is often my ambition in clever disguise. My intuition, however, is usually a trustworthy guide: beautiful, playful, graceful. This year, I want to focus on following my intuition.

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I deeply resonate with this, Kelly. Over the past four years, I've been on a journey to rediscover my intuition and learn to trust it as my guide. It's become such a cornerstone of my practice that I now include the phrase, 'May I let my intuition guide me,' in my daily loving-kindness meditation. It's beautiful to see how intuition can lead us with grace and playfulness when we let it.

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I am curious about your daily loving-kindness meditation…what it is and how do you do it?

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Dear Rena,

Thank you for your curiosity! My daily loving-kindness meditation is a gentle practice that helps me connect with compassion—for myself and others.

I most often do it just after having woken up, still in bed. I get conscious about my body, my breath and begin with a few deep breaths to center myself, followed by silently repeating phrases in my head:

I start with this personal special set of phrases, that has changed and evolved over time:

- May I love and accept myself as I am.

- May I be safe, secure and protected.

- May I be valid, significant, worthy and lovable.

- May I be the creator of my own live.

- May I make conscious, wise, embodied choices about how to live an integrated, healthy, satisfying life.

- May my intuition guide my path.

- May I trust myself, the process and all the people who are there to support me.

- May I surrender to what is and accept things as they are.

- May I step into my own power.

follow by the the general set of phrases:

- May I be free from inner and outer harm.

- May I be healthy well and save.

- May I be happy.

- May I have a peaceful heart and be free.

And then I extend these 4 phrases out into the world, to near loved one, to colleagues or friends, to those who are difficult to be around and finally to the community and all Beings everywhere:

- May You/They/"All Beings everywhere, near and far, seen and unseen" be free from inner and outer harm.

- May You/They/"All Beings everywhere, near and far, seen and unseen" be healthy well and save.

- May You/They/"All Beings everywhere, near and far, seen and unseen" be happy, to whatever degree possible.

- May You/They/"All Beings everywhere, near and far, seen and unseen" have a peaceful heart and be free.

- May there be peace in this world.

It’s a simple yet profound way to cultivate kindness and stay grounded.

If you’d like to explore this further, I highly recommend looking into Sharon Salzberg, often called the "unofficial queen of Loving-Kindness meditations." Her work is inspiring and accessible: https://www.sharonsalzberg.com.

If you have more questions, I’d be happy to share or guide you through it sometime! 💛

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Thank you for all of this!! So wonderful to have it all spelled out. I’ve done a LK mediation for years but I like your take on it. Even the may I am valid. I had to read it twice since it didn’t make sense grammatically to me but now I think I get it. It’s not a command.

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Ruth, I'm so glad you stumbled upon this! I truly appreciate your curiosity and reflection. Honestly, I don’t know where this grammatical quirk sneaked in—yet I’m fairly certain I’ve heard it somewhere before. As a non-native English speaker, the subtle difference in meaning didn’t catch my attention at first.

Interestingly, in the part where the phrases are extended outward, I did use "be," but not in the "I" section. It’s something I’ll revisit to ensure clarity going forward—thank you for highlighting it!

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Well, it certainly made me think and I will enjoy your words going forward.

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I sometimes include these as well:

May I be filled with kindness, compassion, and humility. (2021)

May all good things come to me. (2020)

This one, in particular, often seems to change the way the day unfolds:

May I feel a sense of contentment and fulfillment as I move through my day.

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Hear, hear to the Sharon Salzburg shout out!

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Yes, she is such an icon and unbelievable kind person.

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My word for last year was laughter, and it feels like an integrated part of my life now. I hope intuition becomes as integrated this year into my life, as you have made it into yours!

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I am sure of that, Kelly. It will.

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I love the hope this brings, that focusing on n being for a year can integrate it.

I know this, of course; have done it and seen what happens. And yet. It’s good to be reminded.

Do you have a handful of posts scheduled for check-ins and cheerleading? 😉 Related question: when’s the hardest time to keep going? (I’m guessing from week 6 to week 12, the fourth bet based on when people bail on New Year’s resolutions and the latter because a bigger new habit is still wobbly but somewhat more familiar at that point.)

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David Whyte writes:

“Your INTUITION troubles you with tiny, frightening requests often conceived out of nowhere. Requests to stop what you are doing now and stop who you are becoming when you do them.

Always follow them-they are your relationship with your future self.”

Kelly- I’m not sure where I read that but when I read something noteworthy, or to live by, I write it in a journal reserved for wise words. I captured that many years back. Now I know why my intuition told me back then to add it to the journal 😁

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That's beautiful, James, and I love David Whyte's work!

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My son gave me an autographed copy of his new book CONSOLATIONS II for Christmas. Highly recommend!

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What?! That’s incredible! I will check it out, Kelly.

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Whoa! Thank you for sharing that, James. When you read my post next week, you are going to think I plagiarized it, but I swear I wrote it a week ago! 😂

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I can’t wait! And I would never think that.

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Love those nudges ❤️

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Yes, Kelly, what a wise insight. Ambition seems in direct contradiction to intuition. I have never failed when I've listened to my intuition. It is, indeed, a "trustworthy guide." Looking forward to seeing what your intuition reveals through your powerful words and work this year!

Also: I love Henri Nouwen's book, LIFE OF THE BELOVED. So tickled you quoted it here. He is one of my favorite spirituality authors.

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Me too! What would we do without Henri Nouwen?!

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I just put this book on hold at the library. Thank you! xo

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It was the most influential book of my spiritual awakening. You are going to love it, Jocelyn!

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Wow that’s a powerful statement. Now I can’t wait to read it! ❤️

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Awesome! Can’t wait to hear what you think of it, Jocelyn!

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Me too! It was so nice to see his name

Pop up here and I immediately sent it to my dear friend who also loved his work. We can’t get enough of. Ring told we are the Beloved!

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I think everyone needs that reminder, Ruth, that we are Beloved!

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Yes I think it’s universal.

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Last year, when I asked people to name their most important spiritual influence, Henri Nouwen was the one most commonly named by our community. It's no wonder to me then that we tend to be such a kind group of people! 😊

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WOW, I love that I found you and your community then, Kelly. I have read at least a dozen of Nouwen’s books over the course of the last thirteen years—when I first became a spirituality author. Seems like an act of providence to me.

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I notice people who are drawn to him are drawn to each other. 😊

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I feel his spirit so strongly the last few months, Kelly. It's not surprising that he would coordinate like-minded hearts to find each other.

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This resonates with me. I feel like intuition has the capacity to honor your ambition and passion, while simultaneously allowing you to choose between good, better, and best. I also love that it’s a word that begs us to get quiet with ourselves, lean in, and wrestle with what our needs, wants, and Sprit are wrestling to yield.

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I love that, Lindsey, thinking of intuition as an umbrella for both passion and ambition. 🙏

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Kelly, I love this word. It came one year for me, and I chose to keep pondering it until I could see it's spark, and then be brave enough to let it become an action. There is a pleasant surprise that waits for one in that moment. Blessings to you!

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Thank you for that affirmation, Laurie!

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I was going to say INSTINCT, but after googling the difference I'm liking INTUITION better.

Instinct is what you do without thinking, intuition is something you think without a specific logical reason to think it or because of a feeling.

2025, the year of tapping into, listening to and following my INTUITION.

Thank you!

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I love that expansion on it, Ivan. In my post next week, I'm going to talk specifically about the "lack of a logical reason" piece of that. Here is to you and I following our intuition in 2025!

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Presence

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This sounds so simple but profound, Dierdre. I think the gift of presence is the greatest gift we can offer another human.

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Yes. Love this. Be all here, now. Don’t miss the moments that build your memories.

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this really resonates with me. It feels like something I could strengthen and incorporate into my word for this year (connection)

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Right there with you, Deirdre, last night our family chose our word for the year: savor. It's all about presence.

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Wholehearted.

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This resonates with me. I feel to be wholehearted is to be in touch and aligned with the divine inside us. A journey I am

on…

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This resonated very much, thank you Doris

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I love this. It reminds me of Kelly’s challenge to be open hearted. Living full tilt, wide open with all of who you are. This is such a vulnerable word.

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I appreciate that you are enthusiastic about it, even while recognizing that it is a vulnerable word. 🙏

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Yes! Encompasses so much…WHOLE❣️ May we recognize this embodiment🥰

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SHINE

This is the word that rose up inside me! It was a surprise and not what I expected, but I know it’s coming from that holy place. Looking forward to finding out all the ways this will manifest in my life this year!

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Beautiful Beth, I always feel like my word chooses me

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One of my favorite words!!!

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😉

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Ha!

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Yes. Be all you and shine. Have you heard the song Glow by Donovan Frankenreiter? That immediately came to mind for me.

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Just listened to it! Now I have a theme song for the year too🥰

Thank you!

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Oooooh SHINE. this is gorgeous. I'm now having trouble just having one word. :)

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Ahh, good problems to have! 😂

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I love the way you let yourself receive this, Beth. Please do report back and let us know how it is showing up in your year!

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BREATHE

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I need to focus on this, too, Deanna. Just giving myself space and room to breathe.

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Yes. This resonates with me and gives me peace. It’s calm, steady, and consistent.

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Breathe (and now!) cry!

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Speaking my language, Pat!

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AND

a reminder that two or more things can be true at once. AND a gentle nudge when I get stuck in stories.

"I'm tired AND I can choose to go for a walk", "I'm frustrated AND I can choose to turn towards my children and partner instead of away"

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Oh I feel like this could have been my word last year. This lesson came to me left and right!

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yes, and ... is so powerful, thank you for this reminder Steph

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AND is a wonderful word, reminds me that things are rarely, if ever, black or white. Perspective is everything.

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I love this. So often I get the first part (tired, frustrated, confused, discouraged) and I stop there to work with that rather than moving through to the “and”. Thank you

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I often recall the impact the word "AND" had on me when I first heard it used by Dr Kelly Flanagan in a "Lovable" book study. He stated that we are broken AND beautiful opposed to broken BUT beautiful. Changing the conjunction from but to and shifted my perception of my own worthiness.

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Steph, this is a lovely word because it is a way of self-empowerment.

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Steph-beautiful. I have a new perspective on the potency of this simple three letter word. 🙏

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An apt reminder, Steph!

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Wow. I love this. This absolutely resonates with me. Such a beautiful reminder that a single event can hold two truths. When I think of “and,” I think of “both.”

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So much better than BUT!

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Very clever. It's a good way not to give up which is ultimately the worst thing we can really do in life.

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Beautiful, Steph. AND feels inclusive and embracing to me. Happy New Year!

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Oh oh oh. Steph. This is powerful. So much yes to this.

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So true about life is full of ANDS! Richard Rohr taught me that. So helpful.

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Yes, And 🙏

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Beautiful. Not an obvious word either, clearly drifting up from that holy place within you!

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Oh, that's original! What a great idea!

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BALANCE

I once heard the act of balancing described as “giving myself room to step as far to one side as I do the other” as opposed to trying to stay on some narrowly defined path. I have a tendency to view the eudaemonic as somehow intrinsically “better” than the hedonic, so I’d like to explore embracing the moments of pleasure that come my way with the same sense of resolve that I meet my responsibilities.

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Balance. In your description, it sounds like you’re setting down the strict belief that it has to be a balance beam as you lean into the reality that it’s more of creating balance overtime. It makes me chew on the reality that we can give equal weight to both our head and our heart as we make our best decisions.

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This reminds me of an insight on balance that I had a few years ago. I tended to look for balance by slowing down, reducing the things I did or allowed in. Then I realized that balancing, when you ride a bike, actually gets harder when you reduce your speed. Balance, to me, became about staying in the flow of life. Moving with it, instead of against it.

I don’t know if this idea somehow fits your vision for balancing responsibility and pleasure, but I felt compelled to respond, so here it is. Have a great year!

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Ooh, I think you are on to something there. Spontaneity, by definition, requires a quicker response time than doing a full risk analysis allows for. I’m a “jump in with both feet AFTER a full risk analysis has been completed and it’s clear that no one is going to be inconvenienced by the splashing” kind of gal. I (think I) want to find out what it feels like to just jump once in a while.

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O yes!! That makes a lot of sense! Allowing yourself to be a bit more impulsive at times might help your desire for balance. Glad I could inspire!

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this image of stepping farther into both sides of something, anything, rather than being on a tightrope in between is so freeing. Thank you!

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Wow, you started an important conversation here, Susan. I heard somewhere once that walking is really just intentional falling forward, first toward one side and then toward the other. You've captured that beautifully.

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ELEVATING

To rise above the mayhem and take different perspectives on the constant flow of life.

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“And still I rise…”. Immediately went to Maya Angelou with this. Love that this begs perspective and vision.

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My walk-up music at any talk where I get to choose:

https://music.apple.com/us/album/rise-up/1411625594?i=1411628678

😊

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My 3 words for 2025 are Healing, Connection and Authorship

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What beautiful guides for intention and purpose. Authorship sticks out to me. Write this chapter and own it!

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Thank you, Lindsey! Your encouragement means so much. Authorship does feel like a powerful guide for the year—both in writing my story and fully stepping into it. Here’s to creating meaningful chapters and embracing the journey ahead! ✨

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I'm struck by how these three words reflect the three act structure of Loveable: worthiness, belonging, and purpose.

I notice that whenever someone is tapped into that structure, they are tapped into the essence of reality. It's going to be an amazing year for you, Jay!

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I’m still all teary-eyed from JoJoFromJerz’s latest essay, and now your words have my tears flowing freely again. They’re not just from emotion but from the weight of so many lows I’ve faced over the past almost 40 years. Every time I climbed out, it was on my own—7 out of 9 times without any help.

And yet, your words give me a glimmer of hope. I so much want to believe that, for once, my life is going to turn for the better, not just for a brief moment before the next blow comes, but for real, with a lasting sense of peace and growth.

Thank you, Kelly, for this perspective—it’s so deeply resonant. The connection to Loveable’s three-act structure feels profound, and I appreciate you reflecting that back to me. Healing as worthiness, connection as belonging, and authorship as purpose—these themes have shaped my path and continue to guide me forward.

Here’s to embracing the essence of reality and creating an amazing year together, step by step, with hope lighting the way. ✨

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ABIDE

Based on John 15:1-17

He is the vine and we are the branches and when we abide in Him we bear much fruit. It is like an invitation to see on a bench with my best friend and grow along side of Him! That is what I desire more than anything in 2025- more time to sit on a bench, or better yet, a comfy couch, with Jesus who loves me deeply!

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I love the word abide. I feel like this is such a beautiful reminder to stay connected, leaning in to the Lord for consistent guidance, clarity, and direction.

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Constant guidance, clarity, and direction - exactly what I am hoping for in 2025!!!

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What a powerful reminder that the presence of God is as much up to us as it is to God.

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I would say, His presence is not up to us at all. He is omnipresent whether we are aware of it or not. BUT our awareness of His presence is certainly our responsibility. This may seem like semantics but I do think it is an interesting distinction. I do not think there is anything about God that I control. However, there is a lot about me and my relationship with God that I do control or choose. (Control may be a loaded word- but choices are abundant).

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Beautifully said. 😊

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MOMENTUM. I choose my word in May every year because it’s my birthday and it’s spring and I’m a bit rebellious. 😀 Momentum was my word in 2023 and 2024. Turning 70 in 2024 meant I’m slowing down and I just need more time. I love this word because even though I’m slowing down I can still maintain momentum in community (Momentum is the product of speed x mass). This past year I strengthened old bonds and formed new bonds in a community of like-minded wayfarers.

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I, too, have a May birthday, and I love that your word takes into account your stage of life.

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I love this. And I love that you’re choosing it repeatedly. It’s movement , it is ramping up and building, and it speaks to a catalyst and a consistent direction.

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Me too! It's got to be meaningful when you choose a word year after year, like it's becoming your life word. Also, you just reclaimed the word momentum for me. Momentum is more about the energy we've already put in and how it is propelling us forward than having to summon any new kind of energy. There's something peaceful and powerful about that.

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ALLOW

Or rather, as borrowed from Mel Robbins, "Let them." Let people choose how and what they choose, resisting the urge to offer up my advice or input, realizing that their choices are part of their journey. Honor that.

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Yes, Jayne. That's so powerful.

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Oh Jayne, I can identify with this word... there is no need to influence, much less control.

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Yes! Welcoming instead of resisting. A reminder to look for the good.

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YES! And still encourage and support them on that journey; compassion for the person without judgment of the choices.

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Powerful. Something I had to learn even as a paid helper. 😊

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Thank you for your word! So much more positive than nonjudgmental, which is one I considered for myself.

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Jayne, I have thought of your word several times over the past few days and even said it out loud to struggling friend. I think I may be adopting your word as well for 2025.

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OPENHEARTED.

Since reading Henri Nouwen’s book With Open Hands many years ago I’ve been guided and encouraged to approach life in a receiving/giving mode. Living from an open heart feels like a continuation and an even deeper experience of being open to all of life all of the time. I’m quietly excited to see what the new year brings.

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Yes. We were made to crave. It’s looking for the surprising ways you are sustained and fulfilled as you lean in full tilt to all life has to offer.

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You know it's my life word, Marilyn. Cannot wait to hear what that word has in store for you this year!

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MORE

So much of the New Year's resolution game is about restricting or "less." I read that things are more likely to succeed if you focus on more. So, I'm looking to fill my life and year with more: peace, quiet, goodness, love, fun, nature, fiber (because health 😆), etc.

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Yes. The word more makes me think that you are intentionally open to sucking the marrow out of life. Was that from Dead Poet’s Society? I honestly can’t remember, but that’s what came to mind immediately when I read that word.

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I think you're right! And that's definitely my goal.

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I love this! More of things that truly feed us.

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Wow! Well

Said!

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Boom. Now that's the spirit. 🙏

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Momentum. With a side of Hygge.

Ensuring my actions are creating positive forward movement, and to never lose sight of the contentment of what I do have. Success is not more stuff, it’s happiness with what we do have.

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I love this. It feels like you’re being called to adventure while simultaneously reminding yourself to stay anchored through waves of change.

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Beautifully articulated! Thank you for the framing!

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Love the hygge! Making that a part of our everyday lives allows us to breathe, I think! Appreciation for the small stuff ... a celebration of life every day!

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Love it. May you have all the hygge you deserve. I love coziness and comfort and the hygge makes me smile.

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Do you know the song ‘roots and wings’ that was part of the series Nashville? Your words made me think of that:

‘Two feet on the ground, two hands in the sky, you can have roots and wings at the same time’

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Hygge was one of my favorite new words of 2024! I love the essential balance between that and all the new and good things that will come into your life this year. Hope to see you in person in the spring!

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