It is the last part that will teach her. The letter is nice and she may cherish it, but the words that will make all the difference are the ones you taught her to say herself: I am most beautiful on the inside. The fact that she has a father who sees her as beautiful, who taught her to see herself that way. That is what will stick.
I remember reading this letter in your book and also on your website and I thought how beautiful to have had a father who thought that way about his daughter and more importantly, who told her that and let her know. Sadly, it's not something I had the blessing to experience, but it's a wonderful gift that you have given your daughter. May all fathers tell their daughters this wonderful message and may they truly believe it and live it out. Blessings to you and your daughter!
Jenny, thank you for this and for being here all along. I'm sorry you didn't hear these kinds of words from a father. Over the years, I'm learning that, one way or another, we need to learn how to say them to ourselves. Blessings upon you as you learn to love yourself in this way.
I’ve read this several times over the years. And the truth, the beauty of it resonates more and more as I grow older.
For as we grow older, I’ve learned that if our face is radiant (with what shines from inside), it is not due to makeup, though I am thankful for what makeup can enhance;
It is from our thoughts, our deeds, and how we honor people we meet.
Thank you Kelly for putting into words what may guide young women and enlighten the men who surround them.
Saskia, I remember talking to you on my drive to my very first speaking engagement for Loveable. It's hard to believe that's been almost seven years ago now. I know we can all relate to what you've said here. Aging is absolutely beautiful when it's lit from within.
I love this so much. My own father didn't allow me to wear make-up (well--a tiny bit) and while some might feel that was overly restrictive, I'm so glad, because I would very early on have started wearing it all the time if I could have and instead, I became comfortable with my own face. I'm not sure I'll have the same rules for my daughter, but I hope I can impart the same confidence, which he nurtured in so many ways.
Thank you for sharing this, Jennie, it's truly touching to hear of the impact your father has had upon you. One of the most loving things a parent can do is to encourage and interact thoughtfully with their child's creative work.
Also, regarding daughters and make-up, in addition to dads loving their daughter's exactly the way they are, my daughter wears makeup occasionally and sparsely, but probably because her mom has modeled that for her. Go moms!
I wish society didn’t do so much damage. Hopefully because YOU wrote it to her, she will reread it and believe it and internalize it. It reminds me that I grew up with a mother who never felt pretty and who was always so frustrated when she put on make up. I her daughter, watched her and felt her pain. And wished that she only felt good enough.
If you’re on a self loving path, you realize that the prettiest smiles are from the inside out.
Marilyn, thank you for sharing this part of your story. I commented elsewhere that, while dads do make a difference, I imagine my daughter watching how my wife relates to make-up has an even bigger impact on her. Thanks for highlighting that here.
How beautiful to cut through the marketing noise and offer truth to your daughter!
I've been around marketing all my life and it is all too common for packaging/messaging to prey upon fears of not being enough of one thing or another in the eyes of others.
A father's love is so distinct from this expectation, especially when a father has done their inner work as you have, Kelly.
My daughter is a soul on fire as well 🔥
One of the best things I can do is pull the curtain away and let her understand how marketing messages get created and why they don't necessarily have respect for the individual's authentic self.
And then, through the gauntlets of peer pressure, she'll have to find her way to retain her own voice/ truth as time passes.
It is the last part that will teach her. The letter is nice and she may cherish it, but the words that will make all the difference are the ones you taught her to say herself: I am most beautiful on the inside. The fact that she has a father who sees her as beautiful, who taught her to see herself that way. That is what will stick.
Yes! Our real role as parents is to launch poets who ably tell their own true stories.
That is beautifully said as always, Deb!
I hope so. 😊
Just so stellar and wonderful. I just sent this to my own sons to reflect on with their daughters— my granddaughters. May your voice increase!
It makes me happy to think of this being passed from fathers on to sons and granddaughters! Thanks for your good wishes, Stephen!
I remember reading this letter in your book and also on your website and I thought how beautiful to have had a father who thought that way about his daughter and more importantly, who told her that and let her know. Sadly, it's not something I had the blessing to experience, but it's a wonderful gift that you have given your daughter. May all fathers tell their daughters this wonderful message and may they truly believe it and live it out. Blessings to you and your daughter!
Jenny, thank you for this and for being here all along. I'm sorry you didn't hear these kinds of words from a father. Over the years, I'm learning that, one way or another, we need to learn how to say them to ourselves. Blessings upon you as you learn to love yourself in this way.
I’ve read this several times over the years. And the truth, the beauty of it resonates more and more as I grow older.
For as we grow older, I’ve learned that if our face is radiant (with what shines from inside), it is not due to makeup, though I am thankful for what makeup can enhance;
It is from our thoughts, our deeds, and how we honor people we meet.
Thank you Kelly for putting into words what may guide young women and enlighten the men who surround them.
Saskia, I remember talking to you on my drive to my very first speaking engagement for Loveable. It's hard to believe that's been almost seven years ago now. I know we can all relate to what you've said here. Aging is absolutely beautiful when it's lit from within.
I love this so much. My own father didn't allow me to wear make-up (well--a tiny bit) and while some might feel that was overly restrictive, I'm so glad, because I would very early on have started wearing it all the time if I could have and instead, I became comfortable with my own face. I'm not sure I'll have the same rules for my daughter, but I hope I can impart the same confidence, which he nurtured in so many ways.
And I should say is STILL nurturing. He's the one who reads my writing and doesn't just praise it, but interacts thoughtfully.
Thank you for sharing this, Jennie, it's truly touching to hear of the impact your father has had upon you. One of the most loving things a parent can do is to encourage and interact thoughtfully with their child's creative work.
Also, regarding daughters and make-up, in addition to dads loving their daughter's exactly the way they are, my daughter wears makeup occasionally and sparsely, but probably because her mom has modeled that for her. Go moms!
I wish society didn’t do so much damage. Hopefully because YOU wrote it to her, she will reread it and believe it and internalize it. It reminds me that I grew up with a mother who never felt pretty and who was always so frustrated when she put on make up. I her daughter, watched her and felt her pain. And wished that she only felt good enough.
If you’re on a self loving path, you realize that the prettiest smiles are from the inside out.
Marilyn, thank you for sharing this part of your story. I commented elsewhere that, while dads do make a difference, I imagine my daughter watching how my wife relates to make-up has an even bigger impact on her. Thanks for highlighting that here.
How beautiful to cut through the marketing noise and offer truth to your daughter!
I've been around marketing all my life and it is all too common for packaging/messaging to prey upon fears of not being enough of one thing or another in the eyes of others.
A father's love is so distinct from this expectation, especially when a father has done their inner work as you have, Kelly.
My daughter is a soul on fire as well 🔥
One of the best things I can do is pull the curtain away and let her understand how marketing messages get created and why they don't necessarily have respect for the individual's authentic self.
And then, through the gauntlets of peer pressure, she'll have to find her way to retain her own voice/ truth as time passes.